It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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