my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
