At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
