And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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