So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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