he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
