She said her name was "party"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
