a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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