we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
