apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
