he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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