Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
