Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
