i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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