Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
