we have pet lesbian snakes
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
only you would photoshop your dick
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
