Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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