I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
