You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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