okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You are a genius and a whore.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize