butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
