I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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