video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
