Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
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