..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Why is your signature on my underwear?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
