Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
