conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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