So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
