when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
