i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I am midnight drunk by noon
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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