They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize