You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I need water and some morals
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
