I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
