Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
