i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
