How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
