I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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