Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
