Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
