somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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