So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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