I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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