He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
