yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
