i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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