Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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