dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
