you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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