You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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