my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize