I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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